The One Where I Feel Like Jessie Spano

Okay, first of all, this is (semi) unrelated to what I'm about to write about but I put on these Nike leggings to wear to the gym and... they are like completely see-through. While I have no problem having VPL at the gym because... it's the gym... I have a wee bit of a problem wearing pants where you can just plainly see my entire underwear. What the heck. I don't want to go commando to the gym. That feels like I'm asking for a car wreck on the way there so when the paramedics come to rescue me, and they have to cut off my pants, not only will I be pantsless, I'll be underwearless too. Mortifying. Additionally, if I do actually make it to the gym, isn't going commando asking for a downstairs infection? I understand this is a very first world problem, but I feel like this is a legitimate dilemma right now. Especially because the rest of my workout clothes are in the washing machine right now. So now I've gotta wait for them to get all washed and dry. I guess I could wear shorts... I've never worn shorts to the gym before. To spin, yes, because nobody's really looking at you in spin, especially if you're in the back row. The gym, however... it's a different vibe over there. 

I know many a person for whom this is true. I, on the other hand, would NEVER judge someone at the gym... 

Whatever. This situation did not deserve all the words I devoted to it. Are you annoyed yet? No? Good. Read on.

So, first, let me explain the title of this blog post. For those of you (mother) who do not know who Jessie Spano is, she was on Saved By The Bell (SBTB) back in the '90s. She was a classic Type A high school student who was unfortunately driven to caffeine pills in one particularly memorable SBTB episode. After consuming about 50x the recommended maximum (I am making this statistic up), she freaks out at Zach Morris telling him she's So Excited... I'm So Excited... I'm so... scared! Observe:

Now... you may be asking yourself... why does NancePants feel so excited and yet so scared?

Because of THIS:

Before we go any further, I just need to clarify that even though that says Nike Women's Marathon, I will be participating in the half marathon. I have absolutely no desire to do the full. But... the astute will also realize that because this race is in San Francisco, I will be running insane hills. For 13.1 miles. But guess what - I will be met at the finish line by either a hottie in a suit or a firefighter holding a box with a 10th Anniversary Nike Women's Marathon Tiffany necklace for me. I had to enter in a random draw for this race - you can't just sign up for it. 30,000 women will be running this race. Just thinking about that overwhelms me, but also excites me. Hence the Jessie Spano comparison. 

The race is in October. I will actually have to fly from DC, where I'll be for a conference in the days leading up to the race, directly to San Francisco. Again, insanity. They sent me a training schedule which starts Monday, July 8. My goal for this race is to PR at 2:50 or under and I'm seriously contemplating a significant diet change for the duration of my training. I'll keep you filled in with what I decide to do. While I trained for my last two half marathons, I feel like there's another whole level of training I haven't hit yet, but I feel like I'm ready to go there. 

I met up with Nicole, who blogs over at A Life Less Bullshit , yesterday. She is on a quest to have lunch with 100 people prior to her 30th birthday and I am so in love with her blog/life I emailed her and we met up at this cool restaurant in Venice called Cafe Gratitude yesterday to discuss her bullshit-free life philosophy. So, no, I didn't know her in real life before I emailed her. I'm not 100% sure how I originally found her blog, but I love it. She is also a runner so we talked about that quite a bit. It was cool to talk to someone who also didn't think they could ever be a runner until they tried it (hell-o story of my life). She also said something that I loved - you just gotta try the things. You may think you know how you feel about something, but the truth is, you don't until you try it, so just try. If you like it, keep doing it. If you don't, stop doing it. Talk about bullshit-free! And yes, obviously easier said than done, but I'd like to stop thinking thinking thinking and just start trying. So here I go.

Also, I think I need this amazing tank top from Ruffles With Love:

Who wants to buy that for me???

The One Where It's Scary... But That's Okay

So last night, I left work and I was really tired and a little PMSy and kind of wanted to go home and just put my face directly into a lasagna, similar to something Garfield the cat would do...

But I had signed up for a late yoga class, so I forced myself to go. And I'm SO GLAD I did. First, there were these 4 8th grade boys in there with their moms who clearly had never done a second of yoga in their lives and so it was interesting to see how far I've come since I took my first yoga class a few years ago, because I'm sure I looked like they did (or worse). What's that called? Social downward comparison theory? Regardless, it works. I felt like a rockstar.

Then I felt like a DOUBLE rockstar because I DID A HANDSTAND! Assisted, but still. I was a little afraid I was going to kick my preg instructor in the face, but I didn't. And let me tell you something, realizing you can do a handstand kind of makes you feel invincible. 

I wanted to insert a cool picture representing how invincible I felt (since my personal photographer had the night off and was not there to document this handstand business) but if you google invincible, all you get are pictures from comic books and boats named Invincible. Use your imaginations.

Anyway, I was scared to try this handstand thing, because let's be honest - throwing your legs off the ground and relying on your arms to hold you up can be kind of scary when you haven't been lifting weights like a champ your entire life. BUT IT WORKED. And then my the instructor said she's teaching a whole workshop on inversions next Sunday. And my stomach clenched thinking about a whole 2 hours of that. But then I thought, "that is EXACTLY why I should sign up for it." So I did. 

And then when I was driving home, I started thinking about all the things I was scared to try, but once I did, I'm so glad that I did because now, I know that I hate it (unusual, but Pure Barre, I'm looking at you) or (more likely) I like/love it. 

Some examples that fall into the I Tried It and I Like/Love It Category:

1) Running. 

Shelly and me after our first half marathon

We've been over this, but just to rehash, I never ran. Ever. Then I started. And now I like it. Love is still a bit of a stretch. But running is firmly in my Like category.

2) Sushi.

I was afraid of raw fish. UNTIL I ATE IT and realized my life would be incomplete without this deliciousness. I'd be happy eating sushi twice a week. My bank account, however, would not be. 

3) Roller coasters.

The thought of voluntarily going on a machine that takes me upside down at ridiculous speeds?? Um, why? But again, THEN I TRIED IT and I realized the nausea you feel afterwards is a small price to pay for the adrenaline rush!!

4) Driving.

Let me explain... when I was about 8, we were visiting my aunt and she let me drive her super fancy pants Lexus golf cart (complete with A/C and tape deck thankyouverymuch) around her neighborhood. Well, at one point we made a U-Turn but instead of hitting the brake, I hit the gas and ended up almost driving us into a water meter. SCARRED FOR LIFE. Except really only like 8 years. I'll never forget getting into the car for the first time after I got my learner's permit with my dad and my heart literally felt like it was going to beat out of its chest. But we started slow. No U-Turns. And guess what... now I definitely Like driving. Usually too fast, but I have places to be, people!

5) Singing karaoke.

Killin' it in my birthday crown up in Big Bear

So, first, I have a pretty good voice, all right? Let's just get that out of the way. But back in 3rd grade (8 was apparently a rough year for me) my best friend at the time (who I am no longer friends with. She has since turned cray...) convinced me my voice was not very good and she was a better singer than me and I should just stop trying. I held onto that thought for YEARS. Pretty much all the way through college. In high school, I did choir, but nearly crapped myself before the audition, even though my song was really easy and I knew I was going to do fine. I NEVER tried out for solos and in college I refused to try out for the small jazz ensemble I would have LOVED to sing in because of her voice in the back of my head telling me I wasn't good enough. Never mind that I hadn't even spoken to her in over 5 years at this point... her voice still played in my head. Well. Then I met Amanda. And basically, she has taught me first, not to hide my light under a basket and second that someone's always going to be negative to you or about you. FORGET THEM. Do it anyway. Be fabulous. I sang karaoke for the first time with her (in the room... not her singing with me!) and even though I shook like a little newborn lamb, I did it. And then I was hooked. Now, I LOVE karaoke. I'll sing it dead sober. I'll sing it with a live band, with a karaoke track, whatever. I LOVE it.

So, as I've said previously, be scared. Do it anyway. You never know what you'll discover you like. What things have you tried that scared you but you're glad you tried it???

The One Where You Learn About the Runners' Inner Circle of Trust

So if you're not a runner, this post may be mildly annoying to you. I remember back when I did not work out and running was not EVEN an option in my mind, I hated even hearing people talk about it, so if that's you... Come back tomorrow! But first, here's a picture of a dog in running gear for you to enjoy.

If you're sticking around, I'd like to talk about the unexpected side effects of running. Because, yes, we all know the traditional benefits/side effects of running: your butt gets smaller, your VO2 max improves, you get that endorphin high yadda yadda yadda. That is NOT what I'm talking about today. I'm talking about the things you didn't even realize were going to now be something that entered your brain. The fun side effects. Such as...

1. Suddenly, thinking about having to run through O'Hare to make the last connecting flight of the night to your hometown doesn't fill you with dread.

Run, run Rudolph! Santa's gotta make it to town!

2. You discover the runner's inner circle of trust (as I like to call it). It's that feeling when you pass another runner on the road or make eye contact with another runner on the treadmill at the gym and you both kind of nod and recognize that other person's efforts and you know what they're going through.

3. You have lots of time to think, so you start planning out music videos to the songs you're listening to, detailed revenge fantasies, what you're going to wear when you go out that night, etc.

Hahaha

4. You are better able to gauge distance in real life. Especially when driving and your GPS tells you you're going to turn in .4 miles... Now you know approximately how far ahead that will be and you don't necessarily have to immediately put on your blinker and panic that you're in the wrong lane.

5. You find yourself spending inordinate amounts of time on Nike's apparel page and wishing someone would buy you a pair of these leggings and that shirt and these shoes in all the colors in your size.

NEED

6. I know, I know, I wrote about this in my post about my latest half marathon adventure, but honestly, once you realize you have the power to start running and find yourself running further and faster and better than you have before, you come to realize that if you can run... You can do anything you want. You learn that just because the story you've always told yourself is that you can't doesn't mean that is true. You have the power at any time to stop, assess, and make a change.

If you're a runner, what kind of unexpected side effects did YOU experience when you started running?

The One Where I Ran 13.1 Miles... For the Second Time

I hope you're ready for an inspiring story. Not like "homeless to Harvard" inspiring or "beat Stage-4 breast cancer" inspiring. Just your average, everyday, garden-variety inspiring, but you might still cry if you're PMS-ing. (You were warned.)

Not so long ago, I was one of these people:

Like, seriously, I did not run AT ALL EVER UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. If I was in the same situation as the McAllister family in Home Alone, I would have missed that plane to Paris and probably realized my son was not with the brood as he should be due to the fact that I would have refused to run to the gate and then the movie would be very boring and short. 

There were multiple reasons behind this. First, I thought running was for skinny people. Or at least, in-shape people. (Spoiler: it's not. Everybody starts somewhere.) Also, I was self-conscious. Example thought: "Oh my god, everyone can SEE me while running. Embarrassing. Better stick to the elliptical." (Spoiler: Nobody is looking at you while you're working out. Also, you look pretty much the same on the treadmill vs. the elliptical.) Finally, I was just plain scared to try running because it was going to be hard, and hurt, and I'd be out of breath and I wouldn't be very good at it. I didn't like doing things I wasn't positive I was going to be good at. Then... I met this lady:

Me and my previous trainer, Ange, just being us.

Her name's Ange and she's a very super talented personal trainer. With her help and encouragement, I went from literally not being able to run a quarter mile without stopping to the point where I was yesterday when I ran for seven and a half miles without stopping. Now, I wasn't running very fast, but still. Seven and a freaking half miles is a long time to go without stopping. Spoiler: it's almost all mental. Ange helped me learn that I CAN do things, even when they're scary and even if I may not be good at them the first or second or even fifth time around. You just have to keep trying. We don't train together anymore, but until the day I die, I will credit her with helping me realize at least part of my potential as a human being. (Sappitty sap sap.)

So, now, these days, I kind of like to run. I am now kind of like this:

And as a result, my friend/running partner/sole sister Shelly and I completed our second half marathon in less than a year together yesterday. We also ran our first 5K together less than two years ago. Which was the first time I ever ran that far because in training for that 5K, the longest I ran was about 2.5 miles. 

Shelly and me after the OC Fair 5K!

Anyway, Shelly's awesome. She is the funniest person I know, which makes running with her always a good time. So we completed the OC Half Marathon last May, and about ten seconds after crossing the finish line (before I felt like puking) we agreed we'd sign up for another one. And we picked the Tinkerbell Half Marathon at Disneyland. (Which, BY THE WAY, definitely earns the award for most organized race we've ever attended. Over 11,000 people ran and I only had to wait 5 minutes for a porta-potty before the race. THAT is an achievement.) 

This half was a totally different mental experience from the OC half last May. We both agreed that the miles seemed to go much faster and we both just felt amazing (mentally) throughout the race. Physically, I was definitely stronger thanks to my current trainer Ashley, hence the nonstop 7.5 miles, and mentally I just kept telling myself "I can DO this." And I did it. No questions asked. The night before the race, I really had doubts I'd finish since I didn't run as often as I did before my first half, but maybe that was better? I honestly don't know. 

Anyway, one of my favorite things about races are the signs spectators hold up during the race. Some of my favorites include: I Bet This Felt Like a Better Idea Three Months Ago; Running: Not Just From the Cops Anymore; and DLF>DNF>>>DNS (Dead Last Finish Is Better Than Did Not Finish Which Is Immensely Better Than Did Not Start.) I didn't take pictures of people's signs along the course, but I found pictures that other runners took and posted on the Facebook page for the Tinkerbell half. Here are a selection of some other good ones:

Full disclosure: this pic was taken at a race in NYC, but I saw people holding signs that said both of these things yesterday.
Left: You've trained longer than Kim Kardashian was married!
Right: Your feet are hurting because you're kicking so much ASS

I did not see this sign, but I wish I had!

So, I crossed the finish line for this race, found Shelly... and promptly burst into tears and clutched at her like a small child. I was just so PROUD of us for doing this race when we both had our doubts and proud of us for coming so far in general. We are proof that if you want to, you can do it. 

After, with our SWEET medals!

My friend from college, Jill, was also in town to run, but we somehow did not get a picture together. However, I did take this hilario pic in Buca where we all went for pre-race carbo loading:

Why is this cat sitting in a spoonful of pasta? And why is it so happy?

Jill had a PR yesterday and I am proud of her, too! Especially since I KNOW she stopped to take pics with the Disney characters that were posted along the course. :-)

Anyway, don't worry - I'm not going to talk about how awesome I am in all my posts. But the moral of this story is if it scares you, do it anyway. And you are capable of more than you imagined. 

And finally, always eat a cupcake the night before you run. It'll make you happy.