The One Where We Discuss Basil

Ok. First. Drum roll please...

As of today, I have successfully kept my basil plant alive for over a month! (Tricked ya there with the drum roll, didn't I? You thought for SURE I'd have something super exciting to share like I just won a free Forever Lazy or something, right?)

This may seem like a small feat, but TRUST - it is not. I was un-blessed with two things in this life: the first being fine motor skills, the second being the ability to keep plants/a garden.

Now, yes, okay, fine, I have decent fine motor skills. Like I can cut an apple. And usually color between the lines. But for anything much more advanced than that... good luck, honey. This is sort of strange since my father is a dentist which requires mad fine motor skills, and my mom needlepointed our family stockings one year, which is just one example of her insane fine motor skills and I've trusted my sister to apply eyelash extensions on me, which also requires steady paws.

You don't want an amateur or a drunk doing this to you!

This lack of fine motor skills is somewhat of a running joke in my family and I think the following story best illustrates just how terrible they are. When I was in 2nd grade, our class made a quilt and everyone (including the boys) sewed a little 4"x4" square of the quilt. We all got to pick what fabric we could use for our square and one of the classroom volunteer moms taught us the basics of sewing. Guess how long it took me to complete my square... An ENTIRE EXTRA WEEK'S WORTH OF RECESS.

A relatively accurate representation of what I'm sure my face looked like through this whole process...

I was the last person to finish, including all the boys. Looking back, I realize I maaaaaay have partially been taking my time because recess was kind of hell for me considering I was a large child and running/playing was unappealing to me, especially in Arizona in August. Since then, guess how many things I've sewn... a big fat zero. I literally take my clothes to my dry cleaners so she can fix my fallen hems. Oh well. I've got more important things to do!

Anyway, the second thing I was un-blessed with was this lack of plant-taking-care-of ability. A lot of it stems from the fact that I am constantly forgetting to water my plants. This time around, though, I put it right above my sink so I have no choice but to stare at it every single time I'm rinsing off dishes or getting a glass of water. So I think that forced attention has been the key to its survival. I mean, just look at it!

Now who wants to come over for some pesto?? Okay, but seriously, if you are coming over for pesto, please bring the pine nuts, olive oil, and whatever fancy cheese we need to add because I don't have any of that...

One final thing, in case you need a good chortle - the updated Mona Lisa. This is both funny and nauseating to me at the same time.

Does she kind of look like Snooki? I can't tell!

xoxo,
Gossip Nance